Jet lag is a cruel beast. I've been in Nepal for two days and fatigue has set in. My body clock has no idea what time it is. I want to sleep at two in the afternoon and wake a 4AM. Actually, that's not much different than my normal insomniac tendencies, but it's 5:30 in the morning now and I'm wide awake. I can see the grey light of morning seeping through the window getting lighter as I write. Car horns are slowly beginning to beep like alarms and the quiet of night it dissipating. What better to do than write an entry...
I saw bodies burning next to a river yesterday. We have a few days in Kathmandu before we head to the clinic and sightseeing is the objective. Andrew, the leader of the group and founder of the Acupuncture Relief Project, is serving as our tour guide. He took us to Pashupatinath Temple. The temple is on the banks of the Bagmati River, which eventually feeds into the Ganges, the holy fiver. Along the river are funeral ghats, platforms where bodies are burned. This is a Hindu temple and according to their belief, reincarnation is constant. The soul lives forever but the body is merely a vessel for this lifetime. Therefore, when one dies the body is nothing and burned the day it dies. Death is as honored, acknowledged and ceremonious as life. When someone in the family dies, a male in the family must light the initial spark of the fire and also must offer a small bone from the departed to the river before the ashes are dumped. Women are not usually present, I was told this was because up until the 70s wives were still burned along side their husbands, whether they wanted to die or not. I'd avoid the ghats too.
On the opposite side of the river were temples devoted to fertility. This speaks to the close relationship Nepal has with life and death. I wish my culture would honor death in a similar manner, then perhaps I wouldn't fear it as much as I do. I feel we avoid the inevitable, hide it and try to pretend it didn't happen. Sometimes funerals feel like just another task to take care of, instead of an honoring of what was lost. Previous to arriving here I decided this trip would be somewhat devoted to understanding my own relationship with death. I don't necessarily fear my own death, I've somehow maintained the ridiculous idea that I'm immortal, which translates to a lack of acknowledgement of my own mortality. Instead I fear the death of loved ones and my inability to deal. My grandmother passed last year, this was the first close relative I've lost, which is rare for someone 30 years old. Since then I've had perhaps an irrational fear of others dying. I'm not ready. I like things as they are. I believe this life isn't all there is and reincarnation is definite, but I do believe the relationship I have with everyone in this lifetime is all there is until the next one. The void left behind when someone is no longer alive feels vast and empty. It's something I cannot control, which means I have no concept of how to handle it. Acceptance and surrender are probably required, but until then I'll fear what will come no matter how prepared I am.
The temple we visited is a pilgrimage site form Hindus and also a world heritage site. We weren't allowed in the larger temple, that is reserved for Hindus only, but the top is gilded in gold and there a jewels inside, which armored guards monitor. Animals are sacrificed, regularly, except cows. We had a local tour guide tell us many things, most of which I cannot regurgitate, so please take a look at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pashupatinath_Temple.
Today we are going to places I visited last time I was in Nepal- the Monkey Temple, AKA the Swayambhunath Temple, and Durbar Square. Feel free to google, because I have no information about them, only pictures from a previous visit.
I've posted pictures on my Facebook page, I am trying to use a tablet while I am here and it's proving a challenge to post photos with this blog, so please look there and friend me if you are not able to see them. https://www.facebook.com/terry.atchley/media_set?set=a.916838551235.1073741829.20402772&type=3
No comments:
Post a Comment